Okay, I'm ready now.

Z had his appointment with the ENT today. I was really delighted that there was a cancellation that allowed us to get in to see him earlier since I was pretty anxious about the original appointment date not being able to work out because of baby. The ENT said that Z has a lot of fluid in both ears, enough to cause the eardrums to bulge and basically not allow them to vibrate at all. He recommended that we put tubes in and we agreed. His surgery is scheduled at the end of May. The doctor agreed with the audiologist that once Z can hear clearly he will likely make up for any delays in his speech that he's exhibiting now. It's pretty astonishing to me to find out that he's been unable to hear us clearly. I've had to wonder how often I've attributed him ignoring me to him being obstinate when really, he just couldn't understand me. I mostly hope that being able to hear better will help him with his frustrations with communicating and learning new words. Of course, I'm scared to have my baby be put under and have a procedure done, but I don't think the other option to "wait and see" is going to do Z any good. The doctor and his nurse were both very willing to answer all of our questions and explain things to us, so I at least feel comfortable that he is in good hands.

Now that Z is settled for a bit I finally feel ready to have this baby. He's been threatening to make an appearance for a week now and I've basically been trying to lay down as often as I can and not do anything that could trigger labor since last Wednesday. Now, I'm less anxious. I've also gotten to a good place with the GBS+ stuff, so that's helped me feel more prepared too. No matter when he arrives, it's going to be tricky with the end of the semester upon us, but I'm as ready as I can possibly be. I'm also getting really physically uncomfortable now, so that's helped push me towards wanting to just get this show on the road. I'm tired of being achy and giant. He's sitting really low now, so low that when I saw my doctor yesterday she asked me how I was sitting upright. Painfully doc, painfully.

Anyhow, I feel much more at peace now. So, in the immortal words from Monty Python and the Holy Grail, "I think I'll go for a walk. I feeeeeel happy! I feel happy!"